The Purple Dragon Blog

Could you write the story of your life in just six words? That’s what participants in SMITH magazine’s six-word memoirs project did. The result is a book filled with six-word stories by famous and obscure writers. Some of my particular favorites are:

I like girls. Girls like boys.  (Andrea Dela Cruz)

 

My life’s a bunch of almosts.  (Shari Bonnin)

 

Just in: boyfriend’s gay. Merry Christmas.  (Seshie Hargett)

 

Born bald. Grew hair. Bald again.  (A.J. Jacobs)

 

Surname rhymes with profanity. Childhood torture.  (Noah Smit)

 

But all of them are funny or poignant and some so succinct that you can see a life’s worth of events and emotions behind them. Did I contribute? Of course. And I invite everyone who reads this to have a go!

Sorted life, met world, completely lost.  (Purple Dragon)

For those people wondering about last post’s list, I will perhaps re-type it at a later date; it included me getting bitten (ow), the aggressive boy with the gang, *ahem* relieving himself under the computer desk (were his instincts and pent-up testosterone too much for him? Was he marking his territory? God, I hope not. Once was enough), the adventures of the Terrible Three (R. the Bad, I. the Handful, L. the Naughty), and learnign lots of things I didn’t necessarily want to know. But to just continue the first point I began last time:

• When Twin 1 comes inside he is asked, “do you want to take off your hat?” He stares up, eyes wide and lip trembling, completely aghast at the prospect of being parted from his hat, before bursting into tears.
• Later on a worker is trying to change Twin 1’s pants after he spilled water all over them. Twin 1 bursts into tears. Turning to Twin 2, who is never far from his brother, she askes he he can help Twin 1 take off his pants. Twin two stares in complete horror; he bursts into tears as well, leaving both of them sobbing almost hysterically.

I saw Stardust today, based on the book by Neil Gaiman. It’s a really great movie. I’ve read bits of the book, and while the book is great, I actually think I like it better than the book.  Meanwhile on his blog I have discovered a new word: neep-neep, one who is fascinated by computers (but may or may not have more skill than is necessary to play games) and its related word, neepery. I like that. I can’t really count myself as a computer geek to the same extent that I used to, seeing as I failed IT at uni (I know, I know) so now I can be a neep-neep. It even has a silly, amusing name. How can I not like that? I like lots of strange words, actually. Maybe I should make a list. My Mum used to be an English teacher so she always encouraged me to read and bought me lots of classics as a kid, as well as corrected my grammar constantly (although to be fair, my Dad always has too) and so I’ve always used words like ‘morose’ and  in everyday conversation, and know things like the difference between ‘imply’ and ‘infer.’ (For the record, to try and give you a rough idea, if someone implies something, then you might infer it. They’re more or less opposites.)

I also discovered a specialist bookstore that sells in-print Rex Stout novels, do you know how hard to find those are? My Dad and I are major fans of the Nero Wolfe series. We love the eccentric detective and smart-arse assistant, Archie Goodwin! This has made my day.

Anyway, going now, post again soon. Bye.

Ernest Digweed, a retired schoolmaster from Portsmouth, who died in 1976, left 26,000 pounds in the care of the Public Trustee with the following instructions:

‘if during these 80 years, the Lord Jesus Christ shall come to reign on earth, then the Public Trustee upon obtaining proof which shall satisfy them of His identity shall pay to the Lord Jesus Christ all the property which they hold on his behalf.’

If by 2056 the Lord has not appeared to claim the bequest the whole amount will revert to the State.

~’The Man Who Ate Bluebottles and Other Great British Eccentrics,’ Catherine Caufield,1981. Routledge  & Kegan Paul Ltd, London.

About six hours ago a devoted fan cracked one of the puzzles on JK’s site and discovered the title of the seventh book: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows! My mother instantly decided that it involved Dumbledore remaining after death. (I don’t think she ever quite got over book six.)

What amused me that within hours of the title being released, Borders bookstores set up an online pre-ordering system for it.

You heard it first here, folks. :)

There is nothing quite like accidentally setting your alarm for four in the morning. Or waking up the entire house at that hour, so that several hours later various family members ask you in patient, pained voices if you did, indeed, happen to set your alarm clock for 4am. Nothing at all.

I thought I’d make a book recommendation today. The book is “The Shockwave Rider,” by John Brunner. I don’t know if it’s in print, but it’s one of the most extraordinary books I have ever read. It was published in 1975 and is set in the first half of the 21st century. It’s astonishing how much of the vision of the future in this is accurate. True, the technology is somewhat more advanced than it is at present, and there are flashes of the ‘future that was’, alternate timeline kind of vibe that you often get in books published during the Cold War (it was, after all, a rather bleak time in many ways), but still, amazing.

How accurate is the vision of the future encapsulated? Well, one of the main character’s weapons is a computer worm, three years before one was ever implemented, and giving us a name for that type of program. The novel also borrows the psychological concept of future shock, the shortest definition of which is “too much change in too short a period of time.” Considering how many people suffer from anxiety disorders these days, it was a remarkable foresight.  The story is tremendously engrossing, and builds up to a mind-blowing finish.

While in some ways this novel is typical of those published in the ‘golden age’ of sci-fi, in other ways it is quite different. The story is interesting, well-constructed, with good character development and a lot of detail. It’s also interesting to see the author’s view of a likely future, and exactly where he was accurate. Read it, man!

See wikipedia article for “The Shockwave Rider”

See wikipedia article for ‘computer worm’

See wikipedia article for “Future Shock”

See wikipedia article for the ‘golden age’ of science fiction

See wikipedia article about John Brunner

I know I just posted a book meme, but I got tagged for a second one by Radioactive Jam, so I am honour-bound to post this one. :)

This is how it works: You grab the book closest to you. Open to page 123. Scroll down to the 5th sentence. Post the next 3 sentences on your blog, as well as the book and the author. Tag 3 people.

And even if it disappeared as “disco” from the popular mainstream, disco music would continue to spawn new generations of dance music down to the present. The spirit of the boogie lived on, even if in the eighties no one would be caught dead using the word “boogie” and meaning it in any way but ironically. After tbe passing of disco as a fad and remarkable pop-culture phenomenon, what was left was the best part of all: really terrific dance music.

Thank you “A Brief History of Disco” by John-Manuel Andriote. (Question: If your book on disco is 195 pages long, can you really refer to it as “brief”?)

Here are my three people I’m tagging: the Reverend Anaglyph, Dorian Gray, and JediMacfan. I don’t know if they actually all read this thing, but anyhoo….

I decided to respond to a meme at RaJ’s blog. 

One book that changed your life:

Jostein Gaarder’s “Sophie’s World.” It’s a novel that simultaneously introduces you to philosophy. I’d reccommend it to anyone who wants to get a grip on philosophy and its history without going through dry or difficult texts, or who simply wants to read a book that is vastly different to any other. I was fourteen when I read this, and it completelty changed the way I looked at the world and thought. There were some boring bits, where history was involved, but most of it was greatly absorbing and you never knew what was going to happen next.

One book you’ve read more than once:

Ooh, so many choices… How ’bout “Eight Days of Luke” by Diana Wynne Jones? I have almost ever novel she’s ever written, which takes up a huge chunk of my bookcase. I love the way she seamlessly weaves myth and legend into modern tales, as well as accurately reflecting life for young people. For her characters, life is messy and blurred and confused a lot of the time, which is exactly what growing up is like. This particular book also stars one of my fave gods, a certain trickster.

One book you’d want on a desert island:

Only one??? Well, a journal, a large hardcover one with ruled pages, and the lines not far apart. Seriously, some journals seem to assume that your handwriting is still at grade three level. No thankyou, my letters are small. But if I could have a journal and a normal book… it would be my Natural History Museum’s book of dinosaurs. It’s one of the best dinosaur books in existence, and I got it for my eighth birthday. (Flashback: tiny girl sits with enormous book on her lap, intently reading about Carnegie and Edward Drinker Cope, taxonomic definitions, and erect, semi-sprawled and sprawled stances) You know, I think that if my grade three reading teachers had understood that I was reading books that incoporated some high-school/university concepts in them, then perhaps they would have understood why I had so much difficulty behaving when we were reading “Dog In, Cat Out.”

One book that made you laugh:

Er… *scratches head* “Undead and Unemployed.” It’s the second in the series about Betsy, who inadvertently became the Vampire Queen and now just wants to live a normal life and buy lots of shoes, but is imposed upon by her duties and the greatly handsome but infuriating Sinclair. It is a romance novel, I guess, which isn’t a genre I usually read, but since the characters aren’t getting it on every second page and the series is hilarious, I’m willing to read it. This is probably the best in the series, while the third is the next best; the first book kind of wandered everywhere while the fourth one doesn’t have the usual humour.

(An honorable mention goes to Scott Adams’ “Clues for the Clueless,” particularly for the wonderful strip about how your mother is allowed to tell people whatever embarrassing story about you that she likes.)

One book that made you cry:

In primary school I read a book entitled, as I recall, “The Monster Garden” by Vivien Alcock. It was about a girl who ended up with her own unique creature that came about after a dish of cells was struck by lightning. The creature was so gentle, so nice, and most of the humans were so cruel. I empathised with both Frankie and the creature, though I think the creature more.

One book you wish had been written:

*thinks* Hmmm. A novel about the forgotten gods, like Rhiannon and the Morrigan, and how a teenage girl awakens them and revives the Dark Paths. *shrugs* I’m planning to have a go at it myself eventually. A bit like the later chapters of the HP fanfic Faith, like here.

One book you’re currently reading:

“Soul Music,” by Terry Pratchett. Really, I love his Death.

One book you’ve been meaning to read:

*thoughtful* Um… “American Gods,” by Neil Gaiman.

 I’m in the common room again. I’m wearing one of my new shirts, a long, skin-tight black one. It’s got a version of the intel inside logo on it. How does it differ? Well, it’s bright red, the bubble has little devil-horns on each side and it says evil inside rather than intel inside. I picked it up at Supre when I went on one of my periodic shopping spree last week.

Have I done any other pointless shopping? Yes. I got a keyring which has the 2005 Doctor Who logo in pewter, and a small nifty book on Latin phrases for today. It’s called X-treme Latin: All the Latin you need to know for surviving the 21st century.

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COUNTRY SONGS:

Si Dies Hodiernus Esset Piscis, Reicerem

If today was a fish I’d throw it back

Mater Cape Malleum, Musca Sedet in Capite Patris

Mother get the hammer, there’s a fly on Papa’s head

***** 

MESSAGES FOR YOUR PC:

Si denuo congeles, confestim ibis in fossam purgamentorum

If you freeze one more time, you’re going straight to the landfill

Assume plicam damnatam, o tu moles muscaria muscerdarum

Download the goddamn file, you bug-ridden piece of s***

***** 

MISCELLANY:

Has epistulas debitorum solutionem pscentes aperirem, sed metuo ne bacilli anthracis insint

I’d open these bills, but I’m afraid they may contain anthrax

Tritis nuntio Martios descendisse et, eheu, truculentos esse, sed laetus nuntio illos odisse Arabes oleumque octanum meiere

The bad new is, the martians have landed and boy, are they mean;

the good news is they hate Arabs and piss gasoline!

Basia basiliscum meum

Kiss my basilisk

*****

ONE FOR THE TREKKIE OR STARGEEK:

Scutorum notstrorum potestatis remanet solummodo quarta pars, et istae scintillae ridiculae ex omnibus claviaturis gubernatoriis evolant!

Our shield are down to 25 percent and those stupid sparks are coming out of all the control panels!

***** 

AND FINALLY , MY FAVORITE:

Sicine? Nunc age, tibi nuntium erroris habeo, stuprator- mox improprie sopieris malleolo

Yeah? Well I’ve got a message for you, f***head - you’re about to be shut down improperly with a sledgehammer.

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My second favorite is Si Dies Hodiernus Esset Piscis, Reicerem - in fact, I think I’ll use it as the tagline for this blog, replacing my personal motto of Furtif si possible, fort si nécessaire.

I found the blog of a young writer trying to get her books published. Adventures in Writing is here. Once I get a book completely written and published and I know the material can’t be stolen, then I will start blogging about my writing. But my mum is paranoid about my stuff being stolen. So yeah, no websites or blogs about it.

Oh, for those of you who heard about the novel at the Sith Lord blog: it’s very nearly finished, I only have about a chapter and a half more to go, I just need to write the final battle and the ending. Then the editing phase starts, although I’ve already done heaps of editing on the earlier parts (whenever I had writers block I’d sit down and edit what I’d already written). I tell you what, boy will I be glad when I’ve finished this. This is the 6th year I’ve been working on this thing. It’s not the best book - I’m writing far better stuff now - but it is reasonably interesting, if somewhat rambling, and I’ve put so much time and effort into hammering it out that I’m really quite fond of it now.

Well, last night I wrote a nice long post about various things, including my new computer and how I was storing my new mobile phone in a sock, but apparently mocking the Demonbuster site was a silly thing to do, because my post was attacked by blog demons and vanished irretrievably. They also stole the editing sidebar so that I am having to type html code to put links and stuff in. Demonbuster warned me that things like this would happen, but did I listen? No. All the same, you’ve got to admit that people claiming that the Paisley Print Pattern may harbour demons and that the Narnia books are evil are kind of hard to believe, right? Yeah.

Although I must admit that if they could tell me a bit about my poltergeist, I might actually listen.

I’ve been trying to find a better format for my site and I have found this one. It’s much neater and cleaner than the grassy one. I only wish I could make the tagline appear in italics. For those who are interested, it’s my personal motto, furtif si possible, fort si nécessaire, or basically sneaky when possible, strong when necessary. I used babelfish to translate it though, so the syntax and that might be slightly off. I could have asked my Mum or sister to translate it for me, but I was afraid that they would want an explanation of the reason for having this cryptic phrase translated.

A Book Meme

Number of books I own:

Oh boy. Tricksy. Well over a hundred, I would say.

Last books I bought:

“Undead and Unemployed,” by Mary Janice Davidson, and “Who Built the Moon?” by some guy. It was on special.

Last books I ‘acquired’:

“The Book of Lies,” by James Moloney. (Did I spell that right?) It’s my sister’s, and I borrowed it without asking.

Last book I read:

“Dilbert and the Way of the Weasel,” by Scott Adams. What I privately think of as “The Muggle Slytherin Guide.”

Five books that mean a lot:

“Sophie’s World,” by Jostein Gaarder, because it really got me interested in philosophy and another sort of thinking when I was about fourteen;
My original copy of “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone,” because even though it is falling apart because I once read it in the shower, it was a wonderful new reading experience for me at the time;
“I, Robot,” by Isaac Asimov;
“The Secret Life of Plants,” because it is simply amazing;
and I’ll add more when I think of them.

One book that I would like to burn:

A Reader’s Digest compendium-thing from 1977 that I picked up second-hand. Their concept of the dinosaurs appearance back then was truly awful amf the illustrations in this book only heighten that. Being something of a dinosaur nut it pains me immensely just to know these inaccurate things exist. I mentioned setting it on fire under the full moon and dancing around it to my Dad, but he said I should keep it because it offers a valuable look in how our concepts of how dinosaurs looked has evolved over time. Whatever. I’d still like to set this thing on fire.

People I think deserve this kind of trouble:

Anne Arkham, because her blog rocks, Sithsnoopy, and anyone who actually decides to read my blog.